When you got married, you and your spouse both had all the time in the world to devote to one another. You used to spend hours talking on the phone or gazing into one another`s eyes. There were lazy Sunday afternoons where all you would do is lay in bed and drink coffee.
But now that the kids are here, your life has a new and exciting rhythm to it. You are parents who spend their time working, playing, cooking meals, packing lunches and helping with homework.
Parenting is a beautiful and rewarding journey, but unfortunately, the new routine doesn`t always make couples feel like they have a proper dose of quality time to spend together.
Here are 7 of the best parenting tips to keep you and your spouse thriving.
Have a Regular “Check-In”
In a study about the most common reasons couples decide to separate, growing apart and a lack of communication was listed as the top factors. Therefore, it`s essential that couples check in regularly with one another.
Here’s one of the biggest parenting tips to remember: Nobody is perfect.
All couples have arguments or do things that irritate one another every so often. That`s why it`s essential to have a "couples check-in" every month and see how your partner is feeling.
Share what you both appreciate the marriage and communicate openly and honestly about what areas could use some work.
Spend Quality Time Together
One of the greatest parenting tips for keeping your romantic life healthy is to have a regular date night each week.
Having a date night is a great way for couples to get together and reconnect romantically and not just as parents. Take one night a week to get out of the house and go out for dinner, head to a museum, take a class, or just spend some much-needed alone time together.
By spending time away from the kids at least once a week, date night has been proven to boost communication, romantic love, and lower divorce rates.
Couple time is especially beneficial for parents since raising children can often take quality time away from partners. In fact, studies show that couples who have children living at home have reported spending nearly two hours less every day together than couples without children.
Focus on Intimacy
One of the biggest parenting tips for keeping your marriage alive after having kids is not to neglect physical intimacy with your spouse.
This is one of the most personal and vulnerable things you can do with another person, and not only is it a great way to reduce anxiety, but it also connects you emotionally with your partner.
Sexual activity and even simple acts like holding hands, hugging, or cuddling with your spouse have been shown to release oxytocin. This hormone is responsible for bonding, stress-relief, and mood elevation.
Being intimate can also help ward off cold and flu by raising the levels of immunoglobulin A (an antibody that fights off infections) in the body.
Holding hands has also been shown to lower blood pressure and heart rates.
Get a Babysitter
In order to maintain your romantic connection and going on your fantastic date nights, you must be willing to get a babysitter. Take advantage of close friends or family members and have them watch your children for a couple of hours a week.
This will let you have a stress-free evening alone together without anything distracting you from connecting.
Reduce Financial Stress in your marriage
The cost of living was no fun to deal with when you were just a family of two. Now throw in the price tag of raising one child at a whopping $233,610 (as of 2017) and you can be sure that your finances will be stretched.
Reduce financial stress in your marriage by looking for ways to pinch your pennies. Create a monthly budget to help you spend and save your money wisely.
Look at coupons online or in-stores that will help you save on groceries or look for other frugal ways to cut costs, like making your own laundry detergent or baby food.
Laugh Together
When you think of maintaining a happy marriage life, laughter really is the best medicine. Studies show that couples who laugh together are more likely to stay together, citing that the connection between humor and relationship satisfaction allows couples to share positive emotions together.
The study goes on to say that "sharing humor may function in a manner very similar to having an agreeable and warm personality yielding a higher probability of relationship success."
Further research suggests that couples who laugh together felt more supported and satisfied in their marriage.
Take Care of Yourself
You may be busy, but that is no excuse to stop taking care of yourself.
If you want to keep your marriage healthy and thriving, you must keep up with your own needs.
Taking care of yourself mentally will give you peace of mind that can help you re-center and de-stress from the aches of the week. This will make you a happier person to be around for both your spouse and your kids.
Focus on yourself and don`t be afraid of a little pampering.
Keep up with personal hygiene, exercise at least 30-minutes a day, and dress up fancy every once in a while.
The confidence you exude when you feel mentally and physically fit is an extremely attractive quality.
In Conclusion
It`s hard to keep a romantic and thriving marriage when you are working full-time and raising your children. You may not feel like there are enough hours in the day to devote to your spouse - but it can be done! Have a regular marriage check in and make time to relax with your spouse. Get a babysitter if need-be and make your date nights unforgettable. By following these 8 parenting tips, you are sure to have a happy, healthy marriage for many years to come.
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